I KNOW WHAT INSTAGRAM NEEDS.

Big news for celebrities, social media coordinators, and losers like me who have multiple Instagram personality disorder. The app is finally testing out multiple-account support (for Android devices), which means we can now switch back and forth between profiles with the ease of a dropdown. But you know what Instagram really needs?
  1. Dated timestamps.
    It's getting harder to earmark life milestones in "weeks ago." "This is our 437w anniversary!"
  2. Linking out.
    Instagram, the possessive boyfriend.
  3. ReGramming.
    Instead of outsourcing this to a 3rd party app, why not just incorporate a ReGram button for a cleaner, endemic experience?
  4. Muting.
    I know, I know - Why not just UnFollow? You know why? Because people are babies.
  5. Scheduled posts.
    In a perfect scenario, Instagram would go back to its early days - when it was about immediacy, kinda like Snapchat. It was frowned upon to upload a photo from your Library and encouraged to capture your raw, present perspective. Well, that lasted about a year, and now FuckJerry has perverted your beautiful Instagram photo gallery into a garbage disposal of Internet memes. So, while we're at it, why don't you just give us the option to postdate the update?
  6. Turning off Comments.
    Or, what The List App provides (which is genius) - Only allowing Comments from people you choose to follow. This would change not only Instagram behavior, but social culture as a whole. And it could ultimately make the platform a more positive, honest, creative, and beneficial experience.
  7. Search function.
    You know, instead of having to scroll back 437 weeks ago.
  8. Jump to: ______
    A search option for those who don't get on the gram as frequently, but still wanna catch up on #tbts without scrolling all the way back
    Suggested by   @amilli
  9. Bookmarking for your feed so you can start where you left off.
    Suggested by   @wonderishmama
  10. Titties.
    #FreeTheNipple.
    Suggested by   @olive
  11. Accounts for people's dogs and chicks at the gym
    Suggested by   @Nicholas
  12. A zoom feature
    Suggested by   @fresa18
  13. A way to make people's faces instantly deformed/hideous, as though they just watched the video from "the ring"
    Suggested by   @dave
  14. Fewer ads.
    I get why they're there, but seriously like every third picture on my feed is an ad now. If this took the form of a premium version I have to pay for, that's cool; I just at least would like the option.
    Suggested by   @nelle
  15. Lists!
    Like the Twitter ones, not the ones on this app. I hate missing friends' posts because of brands making a huge mosaic in thirty seconds. I know they weren't successful on Facebook, but I think they'd mesh with Instagram due to the real estate each post takes up on your screen (and the lack of algorithmic home feed curation).
    Suggested by   @maggieannre
  16. Drafts
    Seriously, why is Instagram is the only major social media outlet that doesn't let us save unfinished posts for later? It's almost 2016 and they've rolled out a DM feature, trending tags, and the ability to search for a place, but not drafts!
    Suggested by   @ayegone
  17. A local search via a map. Being able to see what's being posted in your city without trolling through the garbage tagged by businesses with your city.
    Suggested by   @digitalowen
  18. Limit feed hogs: let me select users to only show 1x per day. Bundle all photos L to R. Twitter needs this too.
    Suggested by   @lukedyer