1. I have one.
  2. It is intense.
  3. And when I owned up to my boss at work she said, "really? Him?".
  4. And when other people say they have celebrity crushes and then go on to name more than one person, I'm like, no.
  5. That's not a crush.
  6. That's barely a recognition of someone's existence.
  7. Mine will remain secret.
  8. Except if you read through my lists because it's definitely there between the lines.
  9. And in the actual lines.