Mr. Peanuts Throughout History, Ranked

  1. 1.
    The Mid 1990s-2000s Mr. Peanut
    You might say that I am partial to it because it is the nut of my childhood, but I don't think so. This is the most aesthetically pleasing Mr. Peanut, by any measure. All the other Mr. Peanuts have something wrong with them, most catastrophically so, and this one is pretty much perfect. Nice work Planters.
  2. 2.
    The 1957 Mr. Peanut
    The most toasted version of Mr. Peanut, this one is not bad, but I do not feel the same true joy I get when I look at 1990s Mr. Peanut. That is what's wrong with this one.
  3. 3.
    The 1970s-Early 1990s Mr. Peanut
    This is pretty much the same as the 1990s version, except for how this one has a blushing ass. Points deducted for the blushing ass.
  4. 4.
    The 1919 Mr. Peanut
    The most exuberant of all the Mr. Peanuts, presumably because the First World War just ended. Hat is way too goddamn massive.
  5. 5.
    The 1948-1950s Mr. Peanut
    Not an awful peanut, but it is slouching way too far back and facially it kind of looks like the peanut artist was trying to do some sort of creepy memorial to FDR.
  6. 6.
    The 1925 Mr. Peanut
    The valleys in the shell are way too damn deep. Shit looks like a whiffle ball nut.
  7. 7.
    The 1918 Mr. Peanut
    There's just something off about this one. It's not the worst one, but it's definitely not one I'd want to buy an enormous cardboard cutout of.
  8. 8.
    The 1962 Mr. Peanut
    This looks like a rough sketch of the mid 1990s Mr. Peanut. Unfinished and lazy. A bad nut.
  9. 9.
    The 1927-1947 Mr. Peanut
    This was the Mr. Peanut for TWENTY YEARS. As far as I can tell, Planters was swapping out Mr. Peanuts every other year up until this point. Maybe they needed to concentrate on the Depression? World War II? The Dust Bowl? All I know that this is a bad nut and Planters should be ashamed.
  10. 10.
    The 1922 Mr. Peanut
    The nut spots on this one are weird and I don't want to look at them. I should want to look at Mr. Peanut.
  11. 11.
    The 1926 Mr. Peanut
    Hat is too big and the peanut looks like Mr. Hankey. Awful.
  12. 12.
    The 2010- Mr. Peanut
    Horrible. Modernization at its worst. For example, the shirt. A true nightmare nut, and the world deserves better.