People I've Dated as Described by the Song "the Joker" by Steve Miller Band

  1. Some people called him...
  2. The Space Cowboy
    Giant teenage crush. His AIM screen name was something like @SpaceCowboy. Because, preteens are often embarrassments to the human race.
  3. The Gangster of Love
    Tinder connection. I regret not shutting this down in the first five seconds.
  4. Maurice
    I was his (wardrobe) dresser. He was a chorus boy. It was the backstage flirtation I had always dreamed of.
  5. The Picker
    Played the guitar - but also just incredibly picky. Picky about his music, his movies, his comic books. My opinion < his opinion. But it was fun while it lasted. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
  6. The Grinner
    Just a cute little bb boi. In-N-Out and a Drive-In movie. So all-American.
  7. The Lover
    Meaning that he loved everyone but me.
  8. The Sinner
    Heavy religious guilt which led to heavy self destructive lifestyle. Randomly will check in to see if he's alive.
  9. The Joker
    Just a sad clown. Making all the jokes. Being the life of the party. But also being incredibly emotionally unstable and self destructive.
  10. The Smoker
    Our arrangement : I watch you play video games for four hours... You buy me beer and give me attention while you take a smoke break from your video games. This is normal, right?
  11. The Midnight Toker
    I would liken this relationship to: kind of feeling like grabbing some French fries late one night... Misjudging the line at the drive thru... And then ending up trapped between cars for a year. Then, when you finally receive the French Fries you've been waiting for... It's actually just a bunch of razor blades in a fry container. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯