1. Research different assassins who could do your bidding for you, thus negating a need to write or pertain to any looming deadlines
  2. Donate all your wages to an animal shelter
  3. Replace all the waistbands of your jeans with sweatpants material
  4. Dance to 2008 bangers while singing to your cat
  5. Rewatch all of Parks and Recreation
  6. Go for a run - but put on all your sweaters so that you only have to run for 5 minutes, tops
  7. Search for the MySpace account of the person you like
  8. Write heartfelt letters to your enemy, as an 'admirer', and then slowly destroy them
  9. Drink 1.5 bottles of wine and fall asleep on the kitchen table