"WHAT ARE SCALLIONS?"

my sweet 74-year-old dad is visiting me this week. this conversation transpired. needless to say, he's not big into cooking.
  1. dad: "I'm going to the store, do you need anything?"
  2. me: "yes, thanks! I need some scallions for the quiche I'm making tonight."
  3. dad:
  4. dad, continued: "what are scallions?"
  5. me: "...oh you know, like green onions?"
  6. dad:
  7. me: "spring onions??"
  8. dad:
  9. me: "eh, don't worry about it; I can get some later."
  10. my dad came home from the store with this:
  11. love that guy. ❤️