DOGS I WOULD PET BUT WOULD NOT TAKE HOME TO MOM

tbh I'm not really an animal person, BUT I'LL INDULGE YOU MICHAEL. Of course, I would pet all of these dogs. But only because society forces my cold, dead hands to stroke their plush coats. I'll hate every minute of it.
  1. Scooby doo
    Dumb as a rock. Addiction problem.
  2. Comet from Full House
    What an asshole dog
  3. Slinky from Toy Story
    My Ma would be like "get dis trash outa the house BRYNELLE"
  4. Vincent from Lost
    No reason other then BEING A PAIN IN MY ASS
  5. Zeus from Zeus and Roxanne
    My mom would DIE for this little shit. She would MAKE us keep him. And I don't need that.
  6. Goofy
    Ears are so floppy. It's suspicious.
  7. You've Got Mail dog
    Like GAWD just let them make out.
  8. Clifford
    Here's the thing. I would be sitting down next to Clifford. And he would stare at me. And I'd be all "I'm sorry. I don't really like dogs. I don't have anything for you" And he'd just stare back. And then I'd be like "fuck it COMEHERE" and I'd pet him and think hmmm, ya know who would really like this dog? MY MAM. I would take it home and my mom would fall in love and make us keep it and I would have this perpetual asshole dog and I would love it and get attached and I CANT HAVE THAT MICHAEL
  9. AirBud, Beethoven, Winn Dixie, Benji, Marley, Lady, Tramp, Lassie blah blah blha
    All too good. Too pure.
  10. Underdog
    Pretentious dog
  11. Scrappy
    Creepy dog
  12. Max from The Little Mermaid
    cute old man dog
  13. Pluto
    Kind eyes. This one's okay.
  14. Kovu
    Yeah, I know this isn't a dog. I'm just reaalllly into it. I think I'm a cat person.