New Life Goals

  1. 1.
    Make a thing that is described as "a bit of alright" by a British person.
  2. 2.
    Do something awesome, then care about it as little as Harrison Ford cares about playing Han Solo.
  3. 3.
    Achieve a balance of fiber.
  4. 4.
    Become an inspiration to young girls everywhere.
  5. 5.
    Make a fortune writing speculative articles about movies that have already come out. "Could THESE be the villains in Amazing Spiderman 2?!"
  6. 6.
    Read more.