THINGS I'D LIKE TO SAY SOMETIMES

  1. I'm glad you're so happy with your South Korean selfie machine but your opinion of my iPhone is less than useless to me.
  2. I don't care about your fantasy football team.
  3. Your kids are pretty average which makes your love for them that much more amazing.
  4. Your taste in music makes me sad about the future.
  5. Your boobs mesmerize the simple minded
  6. Immigrants don't want your job. Your Job sucks because you have no skills. Immigrants want better jobs.