INSANE THINGS MY CHILDREN HAVE SAID TO ME
THIS IS A JOINT LIST WITH MY HUSBAND @Marc This is obviously not super comprehensive. Just the things we're remembering at dinner. And these are only things Birdie has said to us!
- •Heaven's not real... It's just there to make people feel better.Said after our cat died. Birdie was 3 and a half at the time. Do you think we could write a book and make as much money as those Heaven is for Real jokers?
- •It's like, ok, ok, I get it! They're trying to put the ball in the basket.Said to explain why she doesn't need to stay past halftime at Laker's games with her dad.
- •How do you know what to say to people? I just don't think I'm good at conversation.She was nervous about taking the bus. To kindergarten.
- •Mom, you could never be nominated for an Oscar because you're mostly a TV actress.no comment.
- •You'd better not have teenagers babysit for me because they always have parties.She watches a lot of Full House.
- •I like this company.Birdie, at 2 1/2, when she saw the Disney logo pop up before a movie.
- •I can tell that you want to hurt me!!! I can see it!This was during a particularly trying temper tantrum and she screamed it at Marc. Although she really could have said it to either one of us. For the record, we didn't hurt her. Obviously.
- •I feel like when people look at our family now all they see is Cricket.Oh good lord, how I wish this wasn't true. But when you have a baby, that IS all anyone sees. It's hard to explain to her (and useless anyway) that when SHE was a baby, everyone fawned over her the way they do her baby sister. But I get it. It's fucking hard, man.
- •I want to open a bakery and call it SugarBlush.I mean. Investors?