PEOPLE I DON'T TRUST
- •Singing competition audiencesLast night, I was half-watching "The Voice" and one of the singers hit a truly awful note, but it was loud. The audience stood up and started cheering. This is a common trend.
- •The Property BrothersI'm sorry, they give me the creeps. Also, they're unnecessarily cruel: in the first few seasons they would show the couple the house of their dreams and then say, "this house is $50 million dollars above your budget! Ha! Buy the crap house like we told you to!"
- •People who get to the end of Chapstick without losing itBurn the witch!
- •Non-dessert eaters.Oh, you hate all things delicious, okay.
- •People who cook with pets in the kitchenI know your dog licked something you're serving me. No, I'm not hungry.
- •Children who respond "nothing" when you ask what they're doing.I expect imminent disaster after getting this response.