MISSED OPPORTUNITIES IN GUY RITCHIE'S THE MAN FROM U.N.C.L.E.

  1. Henry Cavill
    This fucking guy. Is this what the English see when they think of America? A potato with a fifty dollar haircut and sandwich board teeth advertising corn futures and boner subsidies with every uttered phrase? Should've cast Good Will Hunting in this part. The whole cast of Good Will Hunting portraying Solo would be a marked improvement (minus Williams of course God bless).
  2. 9/11
    There's not one mention of 9/11/2001 in this entire movie. At no point does Solo advise Illya to respect American sacrifice in the war on terror. There's not even a somber moment of reflection shared between comrades beneath the palpable weight of collective loss.
  3. Traditional Marriage
    The ruse of Gaby and Illya's engagement is too much to stomach. A Soviet atheist engaged to a woman who wears pants!? Even as a cover, this arrangement is an unsavory affront to the sanctity of marriage.
  4. Plot
    There should've been a plot.