LIST OF DEMANDS

Inspired by @lesleyarfin
  1. All website-specific apps shall be banished!
    The Internet is the only app I want to use for accessing things already found on the Internet.
  2. Self-driving cars are mandatory!
    Nobody wants to get hurt because a doofus was allowed to make poor decisions on the road.
  3. Blankets! Bring me them!
    I'm cold and would like something fluffy. It must be long enough to wrap around me burrito-style.
  4. Food trucks have to drive around more!
    Have a food truck but you only operate from one location? Congrats, you're just a restaurant. Come to my house!
  5. Tax shall be included in the price!
    Don't make me do the math. You do it, stores. I trust you.
  6. No more duck faces in pictures!
    It was cute only in, like, 2007 and half of y'all ain't even do it right!