THINGS THAT ARE HOT

An irreverent list of hotness
  1. Improvised public speaking you are ill-prepared for
    Don't even pretend to be looking thought your notes
  2. A fart caught in a mitten
    The smaller the mitten, the hotter the fart.
  3. Calamari
    Don't put that shit in your mouth straight away. You need to wait
  4. Mouth ulcers
    Because they burn
  5. The number after 68
    Needs no embellishments
  6. Beavers
    Hardworking AF! Enough said.
  7. That dude on the train reading bell hooks
    Needs no elaboration.
  8. Ordering yourself a plate of nachos. Not sharing said nachos.
  9. Taking off your bra after a long day.
    Bonus points if you pull that Houdini shit and pull it out through your sleeve. Slick AF.
  10. That girl reading bell hooks
  11. MIni Breakfast pastries
    Go ahead. Have more than 1.
  12. Slipping an earring into a piercing after a long hiatus
    It may hurt. You may/may not be fascinated by what comes out.
  13. Loving the shit out of your parents
    They're getting older and prolly wear ugly shoes. But they're right: you should be thinking of long term finances eating more vegetables.
  14. Getting back into warm slippers
    Bonus points if this happens after you decide you don't actually want to leave the house.
  15. Puzzles
    The only time in life shit fits perfectly into place.