How I Define Success
it's an evolving definition...as i feel like I'm at the beginning of my role as a mother and of my working life. it all still feels so new, but already I've realized that how I define success now is not anything like I viewed it as a PR-ladder-climbing 23-year-old. thanks to @bobbyhundreds for the request!
- •self-knowledge and self-caresomewhere along the line it became clear that understanding and knowing who I am and what my needs are is essential to being able to function in a healthy way in marriage, career, parenting, friendship. I also include self care in this- treating myself well - striving to be healthy, both mentally and physically. meeting my own needs first. digging deep already has impacted my life in such a major way for the better. looking forward to seeing what else I continue to excavate.
- •being able to give to my familynot just contribute and provide for them, but really bring my full, authentic, best self to them each and every day.
- •balancethis one is big. everyone asks- how does one balance work life and children? truthfully, i don't know the answer. since having kids ive taken a major back seat in the work sphere, and for me, that is okay. right now i feel like I'm exactly where i need to be. one foot in my business, and the rest of my body in the mad, messy joy of raising a family. I'm sure a time will come where I choose to switch some things around, but right now I feel like I'm exactly where I need to be.
- •less* regretliving without regret is easier said than done, but when I do it, I feel like I'm doing something right in my life. there are so many chances to fuck things up- in work, in marriage, in friendships, in raising children...and we all do. I imagine that when I look back on my life, not having [many] regrets is going feel really good, so I'm trying to practice now.
- •spiritualitysuccess to me is feeling whole, and spirituality is a large part of that. i am still on this journey, but I strive to find small ways to connect to something greater and keep the faith.
- •feeling like i contribute to the communityanother thing i realized since having kids is that i can't singlehandedly save the world. maybe there are superwomen and men out there that can do it all, but for me i feel like i barely have enough time to get my own to-do list done each week & aiming to solve the worlds crises just isn't in the cards right now. so, i try to do things that give back in smaller ways & connect me to my community- through programs we offer at work, my son's school & and supporting friends who are doing good stuff.
- •finding work i lovethis is going to sound very Oprah, but it if you are fortunate enough to have the work you do be something that you love...well then, things tend to feel very aligned. I've had times this has been true for me and times it has not, and that's just part of the process. but when it clicks, work doesn't feel *as much* like work anymore, and that is an awesome feeling.
- •doing the best that i canthe truth is, if i know I'm giving myself fully to my life to the best extent that I can and go to sleep knowing that there is growth and momentum, then that is all I can ask for. I guess that's success to me.
- •one more thing...and that is: being okay with my life and not envious or bummed that I am not doing all of the things that X is doing with his or her Pinterest Perfect existence. whoever said that wanting to be someone else is the lowest depth of misery was right- or anywhere else than exactly where you are right Now, really. being able to be present and content is for sure a large measure of success in my eyes. and bonus points for being able to be Happy for others and their fortune & blessings.