AN INCOMPLETE LIST OF POTENTIAL TWITTER BIOS

My friends and I write down the "most important" quotes that we say to each other. We refer to them as our list of potential Twitter bios. These are copied exactly as we have written them in my phone.
  1. Bong rip, then dong rip.
  2. Put the children and vegans to bed.
  3. Adam Sandler makes me hate being Jewish.
  4. Tastes like meat fluoride
  5. *pink moscato voice* I have been watching the Euro.
  6. I'm fisticated.
  7. Must we gender the smiley?
  8. Fish-turnt
  9. In the context of already being in a pretty wet bed, peeing in it wouldn't make it much worse.
  10. Californians believe that there is nothing yoga, weed, and avocados can't fix.
  11. I've had lettuce shoot out my nose.
  12. We're like Codename Kids Next Door but we're gay and don't do cool shit.
  13. I think we’d have four eyes, with like, one pair having Doma mykitas, and the other having Margiela.
  14. Cheese is loose. Sometimes known as loose cheese.
  15. I’m oddly really attracted to mulder?? I’m p sure my ass counts as x file?
  16. I don't want to be a person. I want to be a frog.
  17. I'm like, a human semicolon though. If he isn't into them, can he ever be into me?