NIGHTMARES I'VE HAD ABOUT MY 8 WEEK OLD BABY
- •She was kidnapped by a Mexican drug cartel.
- •She was riding on a school bus by herself, swaddled and propped up in a boppy, sliding around on the seat. I was appalled that we weren't holding her but my wife insisted she was fine.
- •She turned into a Tylenol tablet and I promptly dropped her and lost her on the floor of the Gap.
- •Darth Vader kidnapped her and brainwashed @alissamaynot to convince me that I never had a baby in the first place.
- •I was changing her and she shrunk down to the size of a toothpick.