MY BOYFRIEND'S RESPONSES TO "DOES THIS OUTFIT LOOK OK?"

This is verbatim. I've never heard someone deflect from the truth this poorly, this often and I binge-watched Breaking Bad.
  1. What are you...
    Here we go!
  2. Oh, that's what you're wearing.
    No question mark.
  3. That's the whole thing?
    DAD I PROMISE ALL THE KIDS ARE WEARING THIS
  4. I mean, if you like it.
    Confidence booster!
  5. It just looks like...
    *holding*
  6. You kind of look like a pirate?
    I had one shoe on. (I was going to put the other on, too, obviously.)
  7. I don't know.
    Yes, we've deduced that.
  8. Do what you want.
    WOW.
  9. (So I did)
    Totally normal outfit, right? (not my baby carrier)