REMEDIES FOR A DEPRESSED PERSON

  1. Pajamas as uniform
  2. Wear a robe until your bitmoji doesn't seem right without it
  3. Breathing and believing water helps you grow
  4. Sing meet Virginia or other 90s music in the car
  5. Blunts on the beach pre yoga
  6. Hallucinating in a yoga class
  7. Watching Scientology documentaries
  8. Researching Scientology and or religious cults
  9. Keep a routine: sleep spliff breakfast movies dogs shower pajamas movie cook dinner walk keep moving but also safe
  10. There is a shooting range disclaimer that says not to consent yourself to renting a gun to shoot next to other people if you are depressed, suicidal, homicidal, or on medication. Fuck that and the police
  11. Don't think about scary things that may be able to penetrate your current state of being. Keep the bubble around you and your loved ones
  12. Tell people off when you want to, like scream at a mfucker when they are in the elevator getting all up in your face so you don't lash out at the people that love you but also annoy you
  13. Drink ice blended drinks
  14. Watch and seminar mob wives
  15. 1 fruit roll up/day
  16. 1 glass wine/day
  17. Vitamin d or sun bathe if weather permits replace instead of movies in routine
  18. Lavender baths
  19. Or lie to yourself and become a republican or an idiot