Respect if you've done any of the below items because they no longer seem to be in the cards for me.
  1. LSD/shrooms
    I've already discussed how I was once a wannabe hippie, so naturally I thought I would try these substances at least once. Never happened, and at the rate I'm going, I'm pretty sure it never will.
  2. Getting my belly button pierced
    I used to think this looked so cool. Little did I know my teenager perfect stomach would only last my teenager years.
  3. Following Umphrey's McGee/Phish/Dark Star Orchestra on their tours
    Alas, life and college got in the way. In all seriousness though, how do people afford to do this? Do they get jobs on the road? Sell tie-dye t-shirts? Please advise.
  4. Getting a tattoo
    Every single time I want one, I wait three months and then chide myself for how foolish I was for wanting that particular tattoo. My indecisiveness alone proves I should never get one.
  5. Piercing my cartilage
    I chickened out one too many times, and now I just don't really want it anymore.
  6. Being in a tumultuous relationship with a bad boy
    Considering that even as a four year old I would tell my poor Jewish mother how I wanted to marry a bad boy and change him, I'm pretty fortunate this never happened. Who knows what circumstances might be like in the future, but for now, I'd be happy with someone who sits around and eats brownies with me while I control what we watch on Netflix.
  7. Putting my hair in dreadlocks
    I've see people pull this off, but for me, just... no. Thank God I came to my senses. I went through a weird phase at age 18.