88 Lines About 44 Sitcoms

With much love for The Nails' classic song
  1. Alice worked with Mel and Vera, Flo would let you kiss her grits
  2. Hogan's Heroes had dumb Nazis, finding humor in the Blitz
  3. Eddie Haskell was a suck-up: "You look lovely, Mrs. Cleaver"
  4. Cincinnati's favorite deejays? Venus Flytrap, Johnny Fever
  5. Mary Tyler Moore was spunky, tossed her hat up in the air
  6. Mrs. Garrett cracked the whip over Tootie, Jo and Blair
  7. Florence was a sharp-tongued gal, moved on up with George and Weezy
  8. Raymond's family lived too close, made his wife a bit uneasy
  9. Archie Bunker was a loudmouth, bigot with a golden heart
  10. Springfield has a cast of thousands, but it starts and ends with Bart
  11. Murphy Brown's non-wedlock baby made some politicians quail
  12. Favorite random line from Cheers? "You can really taste the kale."
  13. Gilligan's an archetype, the trickster-fool, the dopey mate
  14. Seinfeld may have been the first to let characters masturbate
  15. Mork and Mindy gave us Robin Williams and "Nanu Nanu."
  16. Golden Girls gabbed over cheesecake: "Picture it, Sicily, '22."
  17. Lucy had some wacky plans, gave her lots of things to 'splain
  18. Seattle's full of caffeine addicts, listening to Frasier Crane
  19. Jed found black gold, Texas tea; Hollywood now welcomes rubes
  20. Janet, Jack and Chrissy knew a thousand different words for boobs
  21. Dr. Cox was oh-so-scornful, calling J.D. "Tinkerbell"
  22. Eric Foreman's basement always had that strange, peculiar smell
  23. Fonzie jumped a shark but still remained the very soul of cool
  24. The Fresh Prince found some trouble, playing b-ball outside of the school
  25. Liz Lemon worked on TGS, writing Tracy Jordan's jokes
  26. I'm guessing here: is there a very special Blossom where she smokes?
  27. Tobias thinks he blue himself, tells us he's a never-nude
  28. Mr. Kotter teaches high school, Sweathogs with an attitude
  29. Maude's abortion broke new ground, struck a blow for women's rights
  30. Good Times showed that in the projects, you can still be dy-no-mite
  31. Leslie Knope's the heart of Pawnee, with no thanks to Ron and Tom
  32. MacLaren's Pub was legendary; how'd you say you met my mom?
  33. Night Court's hipster judge did card tricks, was a fan of Mel Torme
  34. Joey had a brain transplant while playing Dr. Remoray
  35. Gomer neither asked nor told while enlisted in the Corps
  36. M*A*S*H's conflict in Korea lasted longer than the war
  37. Diff'rent Strokes was cautionary: Don't let your kid be a star
  38. Latka fixed the cars on Taxi, spoke in terms like "Ibi da?"
  39. The Cosby Show was at its best when the kids were acting sneaky
  40. The Brady Bunch went to Hawaii, met Don Ho and found a tiki
  41. "Schlemiel, schlemazel" was the cry of 50s gals who bottled beer
  42. Of all of Dunder Mifflin's workers, Ryan is a favorite here
  43. Roseanne's last season was crazy; everything is just a twist
  44. Bob Newhart, here's a kiss: I chose you to end this list