Yesterday

  1. I got the first short story I've ever written back from my professor yesterday.
  2. I got a B+ and a lot of his comments where things I mentally had a reason for doing, but understood where he was coming from.
  3. It was frustrating because it was an homage piece. So I paid homage to Jamaica Kincaid's "Girl". I didn't want to flat out copy her style of and the plot, but homeboy was like "look at the was she uses cultural refrences," so really he just want a piece that was identical but not.m really.
  4. I went home and looking back I was really upset about it.
  5. I spent the remainder of the day watching You're the Worst and when my wifi was acting whack I started watching Sandra Lee clips on YouTube. I also watched Shelly.
    Because what better way to feel less like a failure than watch her make her infamous Kwanza cake.
  6. And so late at night when I finally decided to get ready for bed, I thought about how unproductive this day was and I realized the day was really me sulking about my grade and my future.
  7. I told myself, "Okay Catharine, you had your pity party today, but tomorrow you have to work harder and edit you story, and take his comments into consideration and learn. His criticism was constructive, they weren't wrong and they weren't mean. They were meant to help."
  8. And so today, I'm trying. But it's hard for me to focus because it's basically Friday and I can't find it in me to just do. I have been productive in other aspects, and honestly a B+ isn't even terrible. I am just incredible hard on myself (something I have recently learned about myself).
  9. But it's okay, I will overcome this defeated sense of self and I will get shit done.