As suggested by
  1. Don't drink and drive.
    Because you might swallow your straw.
  2. Doing something by accident as opposed to on purpose (which meant what).
    I have admitted to crimes as a child that I didn't actually commit.
  3. That life will be sorted by the time I am 22.
    I was wrong.
  4. Mondays were more enjoyable than Sundays.
    Again, wrong.
  5. Having the same lunch box as somebody automatically makes us best friends.
    Of course having the same spiderman lunchbox must mean your personality is great.