REGRET

Inspired by @amieshmamie
  1. I didn't participate in the marches today. I wanted to, but I convinced myself not to go, thinking my city is too small for it to be meaningful anyway. We apparently had more than 1500 people marching, which is way more than I had anticipated. And though I really did want to go, my anxiety and fear got the better of me.
    My friends were working. I didn't want to go alone without support. And I didn't want to see people I only kind of know. They make me feel so uncomfortable, because my anxiety is much more heightened around semi-acquaintances and being alone in crowds. And I realized while reading all the beautiful posts that the love and togetherness would have been more than strong enough for me to overcome any anxiety I may have initially felt. I've been so upset at myself all day over it. I feel so selfish.
  2. But I loved seeing all of the wonderful photos and videos. I dedicated much of my day to social media, seeing all of these amazing people supporting one another. Seeing all of these strong advocates for others. Seeing everyone's passion for the cause that is closest to their heart. Seeing all of these causes gather in unity around the world.
    It's such a beautiful thing that I so regret not being a part of.
  3. But I donated.
    At least that makes me feel a bit better. And I convinced some friends to donate too.
  4. And I read.
    And I signed. I didn't call, and that's a hard one for me too, but I will on Monday. And I learned.