Crazy Things I Have Done for Employers (from the Sublime to the Ridiculous)

Inspired by @minhal
  1. On the Monday after Indian Market weekend, I walked over $33,000 (about $82,000 in 2016 dollars) in cash plus checks to make a deposit at the Bank of Santa Fe.
    Although the gallery where I worked at was around the corner and across the Plaza, I was nervous. The gallery owners thought i was being paranoid. Today, it would be no big deal.
  2. Numbered by hand a special edition exhibition catalogue the opening day of the show.
    This time my gallery director was too nervous to number the books herself. They were hard-bound and slipcovered. Knowing I played around with calligraphy, she asked me to number the books. Amazing. I didn't skip or err like blotch a page with ink. Indeed, I even didn't duplicate a number. Years later, I found a used copy of a book i had numbered and my boss had signed. At the time when it was published we couldn't afford the book. Not so much crazy as serendipitous and unforeseen.
  3. Had to recall a temporary worker hired to work in my place while I was on vacation.
    When i explained the temp assistant would be a man, my boss hit the roof and demanded the agency find a woman to sit outside his office. The agency reamed me out and said it put both them and my company at risk for a discrimination lawsuit. In the end, however, they went to bat for me and got my chauvinistic and racist boss a woman to sit in for me.
  4. Applied foundation to the bald pate of the company president and CEO for a PSA video shoot.
    After the temporary worker fiasco, I got a lateral and began working in a new department. Now in Investor and Public Relations, we were short the usual person to apply makeup and run the teleprompter. Again nervous and working too slowly for my manager's liking, he tilted the cheap power and thoroughly doused the man who ultimately signed my paychecks. He was a good sport, though, and said my brushing his bald head relaxed him.