Why Being an Old Person Goes

Seriously, we as a society need to learn to pay a little bit more attention to our old people. And all the ads telling us to stay obsessed with keeping ourselves young? I, for one, am excited to get wrinkles and grey hair. Here's why being an old person goes.
  1. It's possible to read books all day
    And know quite literally everything about the most random subjects
  2. Fart wherever, whenever you want
    Who's going to judge?
  3. Have old-people wisdom
    You've lived for 80+ years. There HAS to be so much you know that no one else will understand until they've lived on this earth for quite as long as you have.
  4. (list still in process)