Things That Are Probably My Patronus

Inspired by @k8mcgarry
  1. Clothes I impulse purchased and then never wore again because I didn't like my outfit that day
  2. A text that read "he peed in the hallway again" that I meant to send to my wife but I sent to my coworker instead
  3. Johnny Depp's "Wino Forever" tattoo
  4. Iced coffee I bought in the New York fall because I forgot we're not in Southern California anymore, Toto
  5. Ira Glass saying "Stay with us."
  6. Forgetting title case rules
  7. Cartoon foxes wearing scarves for the holidays
  8. Bottles of water I purchased at the gym because I forgot my reusable bottle at home
  9. Decorative duck decoys
  10. "This could be us, but you playin."
  11. Dueling banjos
  12. Gift cards with a remaining balance of less than a dollar