THINGS I WAS RATIONALLY SCARED OF AS A KID

  1. Large Marge in Pee-Wee's Big Adventure
    Aka: claymation faces
  2. Being kidnapped from my bed
    Aka: sketchy noises at night
  3. Choking to death
    Aka: swallowing pills
  4. Pinocchio at Disneyland
    Aka: embarrassing myself in public
  5. Meeting Santa/ The Easter Bunny
    Aka: sobbing on the laps of strangers
  6. Getting in trouble
    Aka: getting caught
  7. Jumanji
    I mean duh.