STUFF MY BOYFRIEND HAS SAID

  1. "I wish fart beams existed. this would be a great window to shoot them at people from."
  2. "I just want to watch him eat a big plate of spaghetti and fall asleep." (Petting a golden retriever)
  3. "Oh I thought that was gonna be a cute fart." (After kissing me and farting at the same time)
  4. "Touch my lips/everything will be ok/winter winter winter" (what every poem is to him)
  5. "I just have to look at this one...ohh it's such a good picture...so hot..." (Showing me pictures of his bike that was stolen a year ago)