TO THE BOY I THOUGHT I WANTED
I know Valentine's Day is the day of love and I love that. I love love. I love romantic love and friendship love and family love. But I also love reliving the crush that tore me apart a little. Sorry about it.
- •I haven't thought of you in months.I don't go looking to see what you're up to anymore. I'm not sure I really care to know anymore.
- •It's not that I wish bad things happen to you.Because I don't. I want you to be happy and I want you to succeed. I hope all those things are happening for you. But I don't care much to keep looking for that anymore.
- •There's something about the loneliness of Valentine's Day that makes me think of youSomehow some fictional version of you snuck it's way into my dreams last night. I think maybe there's some sort of loneliness I'm feeling by being all surrounded with love. Because normally I don't care and I don't think of you.
- •But it doesn't shake me like it used to anymore.It used to. You used to. But not anymore. I don't let it anymore.
- •Because I don't miss you, not in the way I used to.And once I let these things go, the missing you and the thinking of you and the wanting you, it became really easy to brush these things off. You don't have that effect on me anymore.
- •And I'm finally happy and content with where I'm at.I'm busy and life's crazy and I have no love life and honestly that's fine. I'm not out looking for it anymore.
- •So, Happy Valentine's Day, I hope you're happy.But I won't check. And I won't worry.
- •The girl you never really wanted.