THINGS I DO WHEN I WAKE UP BEFORE SOMEONE

  1. Finally download last week's New Yorker on my phone.
  2. Read an article and a poem from New Yorker.
  3. Look at pictures; notice I didn't take any from previous night; get sort of regretful--they might've been fun to look at in this moment.
  4. Wonder why people can sleep longer than me.
  5. Try to fall asleep again and determine that I will sleep the longest this time, damnit!
  6. Get frustrated.
  7. Look at friend's bookshelf. Judge them accordingly.
  8. Get up sort of loudly to get water with hopes of "oops did I wake you?"
  9. Stare at said person in amazement, confusion, jealousy...I will feel tired all day.