10 People I Don't Believe Have Digestive Systems

Just a feeling I can't shake.
  1. 1.
    Daniel Craig
    Subsists on brown liquor.
  2. 2.
    Rihanna
    Only visits the bathroom to have better sex than any of us have ever/will ever have.
  3. 3.
    Lupita Nyong'o
    Too busy killing it.
  4. 4.
    Oscar Isaac
    Loves to eat, but all his food breaks down into liquid 'awesome' that he sweats out.
  5. 5.
    Benedict Cumberbatch
    Eats in private because food goes right through him like the ghosts from the 1995 "Casper" film.
  6. 6.
    David Bowie
    Evolved beyond the need for a dumb toilet because he was perfect.
  7. 7.
    Alex Turner
    Sorta like a "Meet Joe Black" situation, except he's cool incarnate.
  8. 8.
    Emma Watson
    Just better than us mortals, okay??
  9. 9.
    Tilda Swinton
    Sleeps in a sarcophagus. Every night those scarabs from "The Mummy" crawl into her stomach and eat all the food she's ingested throughout the day. She's never questioned this cycle.
  10. 10.
    Hamburger Helper Glove
    Deviant alien. Do not trust.