CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE: Is there any possible way you're not watching the Minions movie tonight?

Original concept by @stevecady
  1. Oh boy...you must have really tied one on last night. You just woke up and your head is pounding and you're nauseous. And to top it off, it's an awful rainy day out. Happy Saturday. Is there any possible way you're not watching the "Minions" movie today or tonight?