Based on previous experiences of 4ths past
  1. Old men in American flag speedos
    You're lucky I didn't add a pic. I think you get the idea
  2. People who think the best way to celebrate their country is to become drunken idiots
    Especially dangerously close to bodies of water...or explosives
  3. Being judged for not spending a thousand dollars on a red white and blue bathing suit we all know I would never wear
  4. Hearing the words uttered "I only drink fireball while watching the fireworks"
    Memory from last year. 17 year old said it was a four year tradition. That's pretty concerning
  5. My pale skin deciding to become patriotic
    I'm already prepared for the annual sunburn
  6. Blind, fervent nationalism
    I'm all for loving 'murica but only the good parts. We gotta still try to fix the shitty parts
  7. Try to avoid being an asshole today
    Static
    Unless you're a dog, then you can be whatever you want