1. One of my mother's habits is that, if the National Anthem is playing, she will always--ALWAYS--I mean every time-- stand, place her right hand on her heart, and sing every word.
  2. If there is a singer she will sing along. If it is a band she will sing along. If it is an orchestral arrangement she will sing along. Or a bell choir. Or those water glass things like in Miss Congeniality.
    At my brothers' Little League games. At every school function. At any anything. Ever.
  3. She went to music school and is a soprano, and has an amazing voice. That thing carries.
  4. We have a larger-than-average family. If we were in public, we got noticed.
    Mom, Dad, 10 offspring
  5. So Mom's theatrics (which are a matter of ethics to her) were just the supported-from-the-diaphragm cherry on top of the weirdo sundae
  6. Which I in my youth attempted to mitigate by making exaggerated to the maxxxx eye rolls and gusty sighs
    Which were intended to communicate to all and sundry that these shenanigans were not my idea and I was not to be blamed for it, and plus that I was very sorry for the inconvenience of seeing this huge embarrassing fiasco
  7. As I stood in our Von Trappish row, hand on heart, bellowing away
  8. Enduring the scorn of everyone in the whole wide world
  9. Every time that song was played.
  10. To this day she does it, and will judge sports teams on whether or not the players during the lineup are singing along
    The National Anthem is no place for game face, athletes!
  11. It does not matter if anyone else is standing. Or singing. Or paying any attention at all.
  12. I have realized that I love this about my mother
  13. And also, that my children are going to hate me.