Awesome Stuff My Nephew Has Said/Done During My Visit

I only get to see my nephew 2-3 times a year and I freaking adore him. He's turning four next month and he's one of the coolest people I know.
  1. *comes out of the bathroom with no pants or underwear on, hands on hips* "Auntie, I need your assistance."
  2. "LET'S PLAY HOCKEY!"
  3. "Hey Auntie, remember when Chuck E. Cheese sent me a postcard and it had an American flag on it?" (Yeah, this never happened.)
  4. He dresses up as various mascots and performs their routines that he watches on YouTube. He knows them from memory!
  5. "Hey Auntie, who is your favorite team?" Me: "I like Notre Dame." Nephew: "Hmmmm... No. I think it's Minnesota."
  6. "I have SO many sisters." (He has two; one is in heaven and one is a baby.)
  7. We are sitting on the couch, he gets on all fours with his butt in my face, farts, and laughs hysterically.
  8. "Auntie, I wish Uncle was here. I love him." (I mean, honestly. How do I even deal with the cuteness?)
  9. We went to his T-ball and soccer practice, and he turned around to make sure I was watching roughly every five minutes because he was so excited that he had fans.
  10. *he is watching PBS on his iPad* "Excuse me, ladies." *traipses to the bathroom to poop and continue watching*
  11. We heard him talking in the bathroom (different occasion) and we were wondering what's up. It turns out he took his mom's phone and FaceTimed his dad's friend. While he was on the toilet.
  12. In conclusion: four-year-olds are incredible.