People I Would Allow to Narrate My Life

  1. Morgan Freeman
    Duh.
  2. Elizabeth Banks
    I know people love her, but I truly don't feel like people love her as much as they should
  3. Michael Caine
    I just love this man.
  4. Emma Thompson
    Do people actually realize the screenwriting work that she has accomplished? She is so fucking clever.
  5. Tom Hanks
    He could also adopt me if he was so inclined.
  6. Amy Poehler
    I think she could provide wonderful explanations of why things were happening, the more ridiculous the better.