A THANKSGIVING STORY ABOUT MY GRANDMA
my grandma helped my mom raise me & my sisters & she was basically the awesomest human to ever live. i know you all think your grandmas are the best but i'm sorry, you're wrong, i got the best one.
- •So when I was around 11 we went up to aunt's for ThanksgivingWe used to have Thanksgiving at our house but then my aunt randomly decided to start having it at hers & after a few lame Thanksgivings with just five of us, we decided to give hers a shot.
- •My aunt lived in a rural area of Northern California about four hours north of us
- •On the drive home, my grandma was cranky because she had decidedly NOT enjoyed Thanksgiving at my aunt's, which I can only assume is the reason for what happened nextMy aunt's family doesn't like turkey, so they have tri-tip instead, plus she basically never dusts her house & my grandma did not approve of the cobwebs in all the corners. Also, my grandma & aunt just didn't get along.
- •We were passing a bunch of dairy farms & there were all these multi-storey-tall mounds covered with giant white tarps & a bunch of tires to keep the tarps on
- •& my grandma turned to me & said, 'Carrie, do you know what's under those white things?'
- •I said, 'no.'I was a suburban girl
- •'COW SHIT!' my grandma shoutedI don't know why she thought it was necessary to shout this, but she did.
- •My mom got mad & was like, 'Mom! Don't say that in front of the girls!'It's worth noting at this point that my grandma never, ever cussed, at least not in my presence
- •'What?' said my grandma (she was still kind of shouting, actually). 'I'm just telling her what it is! It's cow shit!'My sisters & I were all avoiding eye-contact with each other now as we tried not to laugh
- •My mom turned up the music
- •The next hour was tense silence
- •I never heard my grandma say 'shit' again in my life