THINGS MY MOM SAID TODAY THAT REMINDED ME WHY SHE'S ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS

  1. 'I decided to watch it because it was something with Simon [Cowell].'
  2. 'Uprooting your life because you got dumped the day before your birthday isn't sad, it's dumb.'
  3. 'Basically you should try to marry the next Gordon Ramsay.'
    Believe me, I'm trying!