Don't hate pop stars because they are entitled and vapid and promoting unhealthy values. Hate them because they are leading the charge to enslave the human race. How do we know? Well...
  1. Pop Music Is Literally Addicting
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    The human brain exhibits the same signs of addiction from pop music that it does from drugs, regardless of whether you like pop music or not. Soon we will become their slaves:
  2. Pop Music Changes The Way We Perceive Other Music
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    Pop studios use "dynamic range compression" to amplify the quieter parts of their melodies, making even bands like Metallica sound hushed in comparison. The message is clear. Either conform or be destroyed:
  3. Pop Music Keeps Predicting Tragic Events
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    Nicki Minaj predicted a fatal shooting. Andrew McMahon predicts his own cancer. And Wilco predicts 9/11. Illuminati confirmed:
  4. Pop Music Is Being Taken Over By Sweden
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    Sweden is the largest exporter of pop per capita. Clearly we should have never trusted a place where the phrase "Stockholm Syndrome" comes from:
  5. Your Music Tastes Are Established Young And Stick With You For Life
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    By age 14 your brain has created neural pathways that establish what music you like. The pop industry knows this and has created a formula to churn out hits until the end of time:
  6. The Majority Of Pop Music Is Written By A Select Few
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    Selena Gomez. Katy Perry. Beyonce. All of them have songs written by Ester Dean, one of the few individuals who has her fingerprints in a majority of pop music. Is she their puppet master or is their someone even bigger holding the reins: