The 14 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (4/26)

No reasonable person can be expected to keep up with every headline while maintaining their sanity, so we have taken it upon ourselves to quickly summarize the most important and/or ridiculous news stories from the last week (or so).
  1. Shot To Death
  2. Rape Case Solved By Fitbit
  3. Government Employees Charged
  4. Utah Porn
  5. Curt Schilling Fired
  6. Prince
  7. China