The Pettiest Abuses Of Power In Presidential History

Before you start harshly judging contemporary candidates against the dignified leaders of the good old days, you should keep in mind that ... (click for full article)
  1. JFK Made The Secret Service Get His Nude Photos Framed
    Now, when you're leading the free world through the 1960s, you can't just slink off down to the local Walgreens with your thumb drive and print off some glossies to hide under the bed. You can, however, get your longsuffering Secret Service agents to take your nude photos to an art gallery and have them framed ... so that's exactly what JFK did. No, seriously.
  2. Lyndon Johnson Made People Watch Him Go To The Bathroom
    While working from his Texas ranch, Johnson had a habit of loading a cooler of beer into his Lincoln and driving around aimlessly while having a few drinks, because there's a fine line between being the President and being a bachelor who can't move past his old frat lifestyle. This forced panicked Secret Service agents to chase him, and they'd catch up when he took a pit stop to drain his proverbial radiator.
  3. Warren G. Harding Banged Women In A White House Closet And Wrote Letters About His Dick
    First there was his 15-year affair with Carrie Phillips, one of his wife's best friends and the wife of his own good chum. When Harding wasn't visiting Carrie's oval office, he was writing her ridiculously detailed love letters that could be as many as 40 pages long. Phrases like "I love your poise / Of perfect thighs / When they hold me in paradise" and it got weirder when he called his penis "Jerry" and Carrie's vagina "Mrs. Pouterson."
  4. Calvin Coolidge Pulled Childish Pranks On The Secret Service
    He'd buzz agents to his office, then hide under his desk as they tried to find him while praying that they hadn't let him get kidnapped on their watch. He also had a habit of screwing with his staff by ringing the doorbell and then bolting as they scampered to greet him and take his coat. He was basically the President we dream of being, as opposed to being the President we should actually have.
  5. Herbert Hoover Made The White House Staff Pretend They Were Invisible
    Mr. and Mrs. Hoover were all about their privacy, and in the '30s that meant never having to be in the company of Negroes and poor people. As such, they devised a fun little game that the entirety of the sizeable (and largely black) White House staff were required to play. The rules were simple: When the Hoovers are coming, you hide, and you hide well, because they do not want to see you.