Times Censorship Just Made Everything Way Worse

Censorship is tricky: Without it, we as a society run the risk of irreparably scarring Little Jimmy with the sight of a single bare nipple amidst his usual afternoon TV fare of harmless, unending carnage. But if we go too far, we may just make the problem even worse. Like the time ... (click for full) http://goo.gl/xI5E04
  1. Pokemon Changed Parental Abandonment To A Dead Mother
    In the original version of the episode "Showdown In Pewter City," a creepy vagrant tells Ash that both of Brock's parents split on him, leaving him to support nine siblings with his state-sponsored animal abuse. For whatever reason, 4Kids Entertainment didn't think American children were emotionally capable of processing that kind of abandonment, so they decided it'd be better if his mom just died from grief instead.
  2. Castlevania Removed The Christian Symbols From A Game About Vampires
    So Nintendo's ridiculous religious censorship at once robbed Simon Belmont, vampire hunter, of the single most effective weapon for hunting vampires, while simultaneously demonstrating to impressionable children across America that everyone dies and God is a lie.
  3. Hannibal Hid Nudity With More Gore
    Apparently, the partial nudity of horrifically slaughtered corpses had U.S. censors wringing their hands. For the most part, this kind of thing could be fixed by tossing in an extra shadow or two to edit out any errant boobies. But then we have Season 1, Episode 5, which revolves around a serial killer whose hobbies include jazz, long walks in the park, and flaying his victims' backs to transform them into headless, back-skin corpse-angels.
  4. Sailor Moon Changed An Effeminate Male Character To A Female Flasher
    Fish Eye, one of the villainous Amazon Trio, being gender-ambiguous is actually a pretty major plot point in the original anime. To be clear, the character is definitely packing a panty snake in Japan, but this was changed in the West because our children simply aren't capable of processing any sort of gender complexity. The change really wouldn't have been all that noticeable ... if not for the choice to keep a single scene in which Fish Eye exposes himself and his dong.
  5. The Comics Code Authority's Ban On Violence Led To The Most Gruesome Stories Ever
    While helming Adventure Comics for DC, Orlando discovered a loophole in the Code: If the people being killed weren't actually human at the time, then it didn't count as depicting murder. Now he was working on The Spectre stories, so he tasked his team -- writer Michael Fleisher and artist Jim Aparo -- with dreaming up the most gruesome ways possible to murder bad guys. Luckily, The Spectre can bend reality to his will, so he can make it so none of his victims are technically human.