WAYS TO KNOW IT'S TIME TO BREAK UP WITH YOUR JOB
Sure, your job would never physically put you in harm's way by trapping you in a coal mine or holding your hand near a lathe, but that doesn't mean that your job isn't abusing you in other ways. Here are telltale signs... (Click link for full article) http://goo.gl/OICoII
- •It Isolates YouOne of the first things an emotional abuser will do is isolate you from your family and friends. At first, this may be done in a way that seems caring: lavish meals in a company cafeteria, department softball teams, paid training, even team-building exercises in exotic locales. Spending time with your job is healthy, but a job that coaxes you into spending time with it 24/7 is a red flag.
- •It Uses Money To Control YouA textbook abusive job will use money to control you. For example, a job might tie how much money it gives you to how well you follow its orders. This is called "bonusing" and can quickly erode your sense of self-worth and self-determination. Bonusing may become a "commission system" in which nearly all of your income is determined by how well your job thinks you are meeting its needs. It's important here to remember that you also have needs and you should be free to be your own person.
- •It Puts You On A PedestalThey introduce you to their parent company and then tell you they need more space before they can commit to any further hiring decisions. This can lead to an emotional hamster wheel where you must keep working hard just to keep your job happy.
- •It Constantly Puts You DownOften jobs will criticize you without giving a single thought to how they might change to better suit your needs. When was the last time your CEO asked you what they could be doing differently? Sometimes criticisms may be veiled as compliments like, "I think you should go back for your master's." Don't be fooled: These are attempts to point out how your job would like you to be rather than appreciating you for who you are.
- •It Gaslights YouGaslighting is when a job institutes insane policies and then makes you feel crazy for not understanding them. For example, you may be in an office that offers "unlimited vacation days." When you look around, however, you will see that no one actually takes any vacation days. How can you reconcile these unlimited-yet-nonexistent vacation days? You can't (and that's the point).
- •It Controls Your Appearance/Language/Travel"Don't wear tank tops; they're unprofessional!" "Instead of 'loss,' say 'growth opportunity!'" "Tell us before you go on a business trip!" Controlling jobs don't see you as an individual. They see you as an extension of themselves. Because of this, they will try to tell you what to wear by using a dress code, tell you how to speak with their preferred jargon, and even tell you what your priorities should be with their mission statement.
- •It Flirts With Other Job Applicants Right In Front Of YouYes, it actually happens: Your employer meets another potential employee and interviews them right there in front of you. You may be standing there, with your mouth agape watching them carry on like you don't even exist. Or they may even have the gall to ask you to join in on the interview.