IF YOU SAY THESE THINGS, I HATE YOU

  1. "Still water"
    It's just regular water. How much carbonated water are you surrounding yourself with that you have to say this?
  2. "Sooner rather than later"
    What does this mean? Compared to what? Whatever later is, do it sooner than that. Oh my bad, I was thinking we should do this later than sooner.
  3. "Phuh"
    I don't care how the Vietnamese pronounce it. I don't say, "can I get a calzon-ay!? With some moss-ah-reilla?" Naw B, it's a calzone with mozzarella. You don't need to pronounce everything in its original accent.
  4. "At the end of the day"
    Like are we talkin 11:59pm or dusk-ish? Why does everything happen at the end of the day anyway? Y'all got to chill with that.