Requested by Haile

MASTURBATION TIPS

Oh Hello
  1. Turn on the sexy music from your iPod: could be related to an opera, a musical, or garage band
  2. She is the devil don't think about her or your boner will go from 100 to 0
  3. Watch feminist porn
  4. Stop watching snake licking lollipop vine
  5. Think about your dreams
  6. Dream about your thoughts
  7. Completion is key
  8. Men are trash
  9. So are most cats
  10. Some cats are okay but let's face it most will claw your eyes out
  11. Clean yourself in the shower
  12. Cry
  13. Cry bc you don't have a real emotional connection to really anybody but yourself
  14. Oh cool!