Things nurses talk about in our down time

The meds have been given. Asses have been wiped. We finally get to sit down for a second. Conversations I've personally been a part of.
  1. "Wonder what Michael Jackson's cholesterol was..."
  2. "Wait, isn't harder to pee properly after a sex change?"
  3. "That lady asks for Morphine every 20 minutes. Next time I'm going to offer to hit her over the head with a baseball bat."
  4. "Did I tell you about how that lady got pee all down my scrubs last week?"
  5. "That poor man is so sweet and confused. He called me Joyce and kept asking where I was hiding his dog."
  6. "Dr. Soandso is refusing to answer my message about my patient's high BP reading. Someone make me a doctor I'll just take care of it myself."