I WAS SOBER AND DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HAPPENED

As many of the good folk on the List App, it was New Years Eve not too long ago. I don't drink or smoke, so I am the party mom at most social gatherings, but even with that, something seems missing.
  1. Night started off well. I hadn't made any New Year celebration plans, so I was going to lay low at home, watch Peaky Blinders on Netflix, take naps, and get fat.
  2. Then I decided "Fuck this, I'm going to my friends house cause I already know everyone is gonna be drunk off their asses and it'll be a fun time." Met my friend Alex at the train and off we went.
  3. Bad selfies were taken. Car keys were flushed down toilets.
  4. Alex decided to take a nap in the kitchen sink.
  5. Then he decided to just fall in love with the sink altogether.
  6. Case proven. We ended up leaving him there for the majority of the night, who needs water on New Years Eve anyway???
  7. Wait I was getting somewhere...
  8. Eh never mind, guess it wasn't too important anyway.