1996 MLS JERSEYS RANKED
Major League Soccer played its first season 20 years ago. One of the original 10 teams doesn't exist anymore, several have changed their names and/or colors and thank god above ALL of them have better looking uniforms in 2016. Here they are ranked from ugly to ugliest....because they're all ugly.
- •D.C. UnitedThe shorts are pretty ghastly, but the jersey alone is somewhat worthy of a professional athlete. Definitely the best of the '96 class.
- •Kansas City WizYou can only imagine the taunts they endured for this nickname. These jerseys grew on me over time. They actually had much worse in later years, but I like this one now.
- •Columbus CrewThe good ole bumblebee jerseys weren't so bad in hindsight compared to some of the others. And I take my comment back about all of them having better 2016 jerseys. That might not be true for the Crew.
- •Tampa Bay MutinyThe lone defunct franchise from the inaugural season. This falls in the "so ugly they're *almost* charming" category. Of course, Carlos Valderrama could make anything look cool though with that glorious mane. 🦁
- •Los Angeles GalaxyZigzags and jerseys containing every color on the visible spectrum were a thing in 1996. These look like low rent court jester costumes and they're still in the "top" half.
- •New York/New Jersey MetroStarsThe only name in sports history worse than the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim. Pretty sure nobody ever caught Metro Playoff Fever in these jerseys that look worse than what your high school team wore.
- •Colorado RapidsPretty vanilla by 1996 standards, but still looks like it came out of a 1992 Eurosport catalog.
- •San Jose ClashDear lord in heaven what is happening here? Teal, yellow, red, green, white (and the shorts are black.) The other colors probably felt left out.
- •Dallas BurnI still haven't been able to figure out why the logo is on the jersey twice. Right next to each other too. No one has ever answered for that.
- •New England RevolutionThis thing is just bad news. Some of the others are probably more hideous, but they at least have some sort of ironic/intentionally ugly value to them now. This thing is just beyond all hope.