THINGS I'M HOPING ARE WAITING FOR ME IN HEAVEN

  1. An angelic choir singing the beat from "Notorious" by Notorious B.I.G.
    With Biggie conducting
  2. A buffet lunch organised like a pick 'n' mix
  3. A lifetime tally of how many drinks I've bought other people against how many drinks I've bought others
  4. A complete list of everyone who's thought about me naked
  5. A Starbucks blueberry muffin that tastes like how I remember them tasting when I was 8
  6. The silver reflective tracksuit from the Mo' Money Mo' Problems video
  7. Fanta fruit twist
  8. A man-sized version of one of those bouncy chairs that babies sit in and get placed in doors